So, I didn’t get in … again. To say I’m gutted is an understatement even though its probably for the best given the state of my knee. I only needed one thing from this year and now that its not going to happen I guess I can let my knee recover as slowly as it needs to. There were people with 4 names in the hat who didn’t get in too – and one guy who even had an autoqualifier so I’m not the worst off, though I guess they’ll rectify his entry.

So, I can 95% put this race to bed at least for another 12m. By the time the race comes around in 2018 with 4 names in the hat and apart from the fact that this still doesn’t guarantee me an entry, I’ll be 60years old. Surely that is far too old to be able to succeed in the hardest run in the world when its beaten me 6 times previously. It’ll also be 2yrs on from the success I had unexpectedly in 2016 and (hopefully) recovered from a significant knee since the last time I managed anything decent.

I say 95% since I am 8^th on the reserve list. I was 6^th last year and just failed to get in. I was at the very top of the reserve list from months and as such was the 1st person in the whole world not to get to run. I’m further down the list this time so the odds of getting in are worse, but not impossible, which is annoying since there is still that little niggle meaning I can’t put it to bed 100% until around the end of June. The worst of both worlds again.

I guess it does give me more time to recover but ultimately it is again giving me false hope when I wanted it definite one way or the other so I knew what I was facing.

I may however have the right to decline any entry offer I now get but still keep my 4 names in the hat for next year if needs be. I might need to look into that. After all people can’t be expected to hang on indefinitely on the off-chance. What it means though is that I’ll need 8/25 UK runners to drop out before I get a place and that is unlikely.

So what do I do now? My next MRI is at the end of April but I know inside of me that the knee isn't yet better. I don't think its much better than it was when I last had an MRI in Feb since I can still feel the twinge when inadvertently twisting my knee. I've been on crutches now since the end of December and am thoroughly fed up of them. Using them hurts my lower back and using the brace hurts my shin but I don't think i'll get the all clear anytime soon.

I have now had to drop out of GUCR too, which means after the 4 Inns this weekend that's 4 Ultras so far this year that I've had to bin. The only alternative is to keep doing some cycling whilst my leg recovers properly. At least theres no pressure on me to get back up to speed again quickly. It looks therefore like I will be looking towards the end of the year before I can plan anything at all. Theres either Lon Las Cymru (250miles on road) in Oct or the Fidippedes run in Greece in Nov – but I can’t do both.

Ultimately though, this could be the end of an era. If I don’t manage to get as fit as last year at age 60 - and my head is telling me its going to be a long, hard road to do so, possibly impossible, then it doesn’t matter whether I get a place in 2018 or not.